Certainty in Uncertainty

He is the one who keeps me inspired everyday
Just one sweet text message from him, all the bad bad vibes would go away
We've been through a lot for the past years
We shared sadness and joy, laughter and tears
Our plans for the future are already secured
All the trials and problems, we're ready to endure

I never even thought a man like him would exist
He is the type I just couldn't resist
He may be that I-am-always-in-trouble type of guy
Yet he gives that wink and smile that reaches the sky
He says for him I was perfect
That it's my beauty within that reflects

He may seem so far away from me
But when I close my eyes, he's all I see
He painted my life with the colors of the rainbow
With him by my side, I never feel low
In his arms, I never have to worry
And that I will never be sorry

Just like fireworks he took my fears away
I promised that for as long as he wants, I'll stay
Yes, we're apart and must stay in touch
But this only made me love him so much
I miss him every second, every minute and every hour of the day
And I know he feels that same too anyway

I really hate it when he acts cold like the ice cream
But with his sweet nothings, my heart would scream
I love the way he tickles me
'Cause I know it's my laughs and smiles he wants to see
During my bad days he makes me laugh
In his jokes I just can't get enough

When he chats with other girls
I want to straighten his curls! XD
I want him to flirt to no one but me
He gave me his honesty and loyalty
Missing him is such a terrible feeling
Day by day, the pain is only increasing

He made me hold onto his words and promises
Promised to give me more hugs and kisses
He's the only one who made my feel this way
My heart doesn't want him to go away
So, the question is, "Is he the one?"
Well, I guess the answer is YES, he is the only one. 

Teaser Tuesday #2: Blue Bloods

Yey! Time for Teaser Tuesdays! Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme hosted by  MizB of Should Be Reading. Anyone can play along! Just do the following:

1. Grab your current read

2. Open to a random page

3. Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page 

BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)

Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teasers!

Blue Bloods

(Blue Bloods #1)

Melissa dela Cruz

"There was another door, a more magnificent one this time, made of gold, ebony, and platinum. INGREDIOR PERCIPIO ANIMUS read the inscription around the perimeter." (page 211)

After Vampire Kisses, this book has owned my time! A must read for any YA and Vampire book lovers out there.

Book Review: Dance With a Vampire (Vampire Kisses #4) by Ellen Schreiber

Title: Dance With A Vampire

Author: Ellen Schreiber

Page count: 179 pages

Rating: 5 stars

Book synopsis:

There's a new vampire in town. His name is Valentine Maxwell. Goth-girl Raven knows this latest intruder can only mean trouble--he's the younger sibling of two vampires she fought to drive out of Dullsville. But when her brother, Billy, befriends this dangerous tween night prowler, the stakes are suddenly higher. Though torn by the excitement of every teen girl's fantasy--attending the prom with her boyfriend--Raven must do everything she can to protect Billy.

Valentine's appearance may pose even further threats. Could he somehow know Raven's innermost feelings about becoming immortal for her true love, Alexander? The far-from-ordinary romance of these two teen outsiders takes another surprise-filled spin in the fourth book of Ellen Schreiber's applauded Vampire Kisses series.

Book Review:

Wooo! I so love what's happening so far.. It's thrilling and exciting. I can picture out Valentine's image the way he's described in the book. So far I'm not disappointed with the series since Raven and Alexander looks so cute together.. And I can say Alexander really loves Raven since he doesn't want her to join his dark underworld. Raven shows how much she loves her brother Billy Boy by doing her best to protect her from Valentine.. I just don't want the way Raven's prom ended.. It made me sad for a while but definitely this kept me excited to reading the next book!

"Waiting On" Wednesday [1]: Full Moon Kisses

This is a weekly meme hosted by Jill from Breaking the Spine that spotlights upcoming releases that we're eagerly anticipating.

This week's pre-publication "can't-wait-to-read" selection is:

Full Moon Kisses

by Ellen Schreiber
Expected publication: December 26, 2012 by Katherine Tegen Books

Book synopsis (from Amazon):

Beware of the full moon.

A werewolf wants to take you into his world. Forever.

Celeste and Brandon know that Nash in werewolf form is bad news. But a new prediction from psychic Dr. Meadows has Celeste wondering: Which of them wants to turn her into a werewolf?

Still on Celeste's and Brandon's minds is the "cure" from Brandon's father. Brandon must face one dilemma he hadn't anticipated—if his dad's serum really does work, is he willing to give up being a werewolf for good? Is Celeste willing to give up her heroic werewolf boyfriend? And when Nash finds out there's a cure, will he try to take it from Brandon as they continue to deal with their rivalry, their competing affections for Celeste, and their struggles with their werewolf identities?

Then things grow still more complicated when a gang of sketchy guys from a neigh-boring town comes to Legend's Run just before the big Werewolf Festival. What, or whom, are they looking for?

The third installment in the sumptuous series about werewolves and the popular girl who loves one is full of danger, mystery, and undeniably romantic full moon kisses.

So, what's on your can't-wait-to-read list this week? :)

Teaser Tuesdays #1: Dance With A Vampire

It's time for my first Teaser Tuesdays! Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme hosted by  MizB of Should Be Reading. Anyone can play along! Just do the following:

1. Grab your current read

2. Open to a random page

3. Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page 

BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)

Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teasers!

Dance With a Vampire

(A Vampire Kisses novel)

by Ellen Schreiber

"He grabbed my hand. "Mrs. Madison, I'll never be able to get out of my mind how beautiful Raven is today. A picture could never compare her real beauty or be able to capture her heart and soul." (Page 138) 

I just can't get enough of this series!  :)

Book review: Vampire Kisses: The Beginning by Ellen Schreiber

Title: Vampire Kisses: The Beginning

Author: Ellen Schreiber

Page count: 562 pages

Rating: 5 stars

Book synopsis:

The mansion on top of Benson Hill has been empty and boarded up for years. But a new family has moved in. A family that never ventures out during the day. Who are these creepy people -- especially the handsome, dark, and elusive Alexander Sterling? Or rather, what are they? Could the town gossip actually be true? Are they vampires?  Raven, who secretly covets a vampire kiss, both at the risk of her own mortality and Alexander's loving trust, is dying to uncover the truth.

Book review:

I'm obsessed with vampires and werewolf thingy. But I have to admit, this is the first vampire book I read. I became obsessed with vampires because of the TV series True Blood and The Vampire Diaries and from that I decided to try reading books on them. So thus, I chose Vampire Kisses series to be the firsts on my list.

I was so inloved with this book that I finished it in one day, and happened to read it for the second time! I could see myself in Raven, the main character, who's very much hooked into vampires. Except that I don't do goth fashion. The book isn't boring at any part, and makes you excited for every chapter that you'll read. Then there's the vampire boyfriends, Alexander. Who wouldn't fall inlove with him? I really wanna feel how to be loved and protected by a vampire and Alexander made me feel it even if I'm just reading.. the only thing I don't like in him is that he has long hair.. I remember Eric form True Blood, he has long hair the first time I saw him in the series then he got a haircut and looked hotter! I think Alexander will look more handsome and hotter too.. Eh?

This is a must-read for all YA readers out there, this is complete of humor, family, friendship and romance with a mix of supernatural beings.

It's Monday! What are you reading? #1

"It's Monday! What Are You Reading?" is a weekly meme hosted by Book Journey in which we plan our reading week and it's my first time to join this weekly meme! I'm starting to enjoy participating in weekly memes. It keeps me busy and keeps my blog updated while I'm still reading books and don't have anything to post yet.

So, this week, I'm planning to read:

Dance With A Vampire (Vampire Kisses #4) by Ellen Schreiber

The Coffin Club (Vampire Kisses # 5) by Ellen Schreiber

Royal Blood (Vampire Kisses #6) Ellen Schreiber

I just can't get enough of Schreiber's vampire books. She did a great mix of humor, romance, and supernatural creatures in her books. I can say right now that she's one of my favorite vampire/werewolf authors. I'm looking forward to reading the rest of this series.. and eventually start on Once in a Full Moon (Full Moon novel) once I finished Vampire Kisses. :)

Stacking the Shelves #1

Stacking the Shelves is a meme hosted by Tynga's Reviews and here you can find all the books I've recently received that I'm stacking my shelves with!

This week, I got eight new awesome books.

"Wither" (The Chronicle Garden Trilogy) by Lauren DeStefano

"Once in a Full Moon" (A Full Moon novel) by Ellen Schreiber

"Hourglass" (An Evernight novel) by Claudia Gray

"Love Bites" (A Vampire Kisses novel) by Ellen Schreiber

"A Swift Pure Cry" by Siobhan Dowd

"Greed" (Seven Deadly Sins #7) by Robin Wasserman

"First Blood" by Susan Sizemore (together with Erin McCarthy, Chris Marie Green and Meljean Brook)

"Fangs" (The Vampire Archives Volume 2) by Clive Barker, Anne Rice, Arthur Conan Doyle and many more)

I'm a very happy kiddo this week, I don't mind spending money with books. And I'm craving for more! Seems like I'll be quite busy in my nook for a long time... :)

New books, new bookmarks!

Today I received my allowance for the week and the first thing that came to my mind is to buy new books. I dropped by Booksale and was surprised to see new YA books on sale there! So I thought of buying at least one and I came up with “Wither” of The Chemical Garden Trilogy by Lauren DeStefano.

I was thinking of buying more but then I remembered I’m also going to the NBS Warehouse sale this weekend so I stopped myself. Then I dropped by the National Bookstore and ended up buying “Once in a Full Moon” by Ellen Schreiber.

I was about to pay at the counter when the section of bookmarks caught my eye. And these are what I found – awesome bookmark designs!





I’m feel so great when I reached home. I’m looking forward to buying more awesome book finds this weekend. I need my eyes to get busy not with my laptop but with books. :)

Book review: The Lost Saint (A Dark Divine Novel book # 2)

Title: The Lost Saint (Book #2,  A Dark Divine Novel)

Author: Bree Despain
Series: A Dark Divine

Page count: 404 pages

Rating: 5 stars

Book sysnopsis:

A family destroyed. A love threatened. An enemy returns.

Grace Divine made the ultimate sacrifice to cure Daniel Kalbi. She was infected with the werewolf curse while trying to save him, and lost her beloved brother in the process.

Desperate to find Jude, Grace befriends Talbot, a newcomer to town. But as the two grow closer, Grace's relationship with Daniel is put in danger - in more ways than one.

Unaware of the dark path she is walking, Grace begins to give into the wolf inside of her - not realizing that an enemy has returned and a deadly trap is about to be sprung.

Bree Despain delivers sizzling romance and thrilling action in the heart-pounding sequel to the The Dark Divine.

Book review:
Honestly, the main reason I bought this book is because of the cover, especially I love blue. I have no idea what the story is about. But then when I read the first pages, it immediately caught one of my interests: werewolves. It also includes vampires but the protagonist is a werewolf and I love the way she tried to control and use her abilities for good.

"I know what evil existed in the world, and I couldn't just sit anymore. I guess that's why in all those comic books, the superheroes have to create an alter ego -- the person who pretends to be ordinary so they can still be with the ones they love." -Grace Divine

There are so many twists in the story especially when it comes to Grace's lost brother, Jude. Grace and Daniel seems to have so much chemistry together but of course, like in any other relationships, they also experience problems and turmoil in life. In this book, Grace met a new man, gorgeous and a hottie, named Talbot who adds excitement to the story. I also love the witty personality of April! She's an ideal friend because she is very supportive and I just love how she loved to make costumes for Grace as a 'superhero' thingy.

"I felt like a different person, and part of me longed for Daniel's arms, strong and true, to wrap me in his warm embrace. I wanted to hear him tell me that it was okay for me to be different now. That he still loved me no matter what." -Grace Divine

This book talks about romance, friendship, and family which makes it a must-read for YA readers out there. I wish I could find The Dark Divine book in any bookstore here and I can't wait to read the next book entitled The Savage Grace.

"But if you can hold on to that love, and if you can hold on to that faith, then you are stronger than any monster out there. No outside power, no force, no evil can make you turn into the wolf as long as you hold on to that love." -Daniel

Bookmark these Book-sites!*

*I’m a book lover who happens to be mashed up with the Information Technology society. While reading a magazine on the latest about technologies, I encountered this article for book lovers.

Are you the type who would want to share your passion in literature with others who share the same interests in books? There are many convenient ways to go book window-shopping online and meeting fellow bookworms to discuss with. Below are the top five book-sites:

• Shelfari. Build virtual bookshelves of books you’ve read or want to read and share books and opinions with friends. Users can also create groups that other members may join, create discussions and talk about books and various topics.
• Goodreads. A social cataloging site similar to Shelfari except that it possesses the “if you like this, read this” feature which auto recommends books based on ranking books you’ve rated. It also contains reading and writing challenges, quotes and trivia.
• Library Thing. One of the oldest, if not the oldest social networking site for bookworms. It is not only used for storing and sharing book catalogs and various types of book metadata. What makes it special is that it is used by authors, libraries and publishers as well.
• ConnectViaBooks. Similar to the first three sites mentioned, ConnectViaBooks allows the user to create multiple book lists and publish those lists on their own blog. Plus, it includes an interactive world map on the landing page that shows activities of members.
• weRead. This was formerly called iRead, caters to bookworms in the younger audience. It started as an application in Facebook and it has now expanded to many other social-networking sites that allows you to recommend books to friends.

There are numerous sites out there that offer you articles that are literary related and sites that help young writers out on their literary endeavors. Believe it or not, for literary singles out there, there happens to be a literary speed dating site wherein you can interact with individuals who you might want to engage in the best literary conversation you’ve had set. So, to get your literary passion and skills fueled, try these sites on for size.

Source: Tech Inovations, Volume 5 Issue 8, page 8

Bayanihan Expo 2012: Challenge the Impossible

New event.

New experience.

New faces.

Once again I got the chance to meet my friends from the Balangayan camp I attended last month, if I'm not mistaken. I was there, assigned at the ticket booth in front of hall three, with some of my friends beside me. Crowds of people were streaming in front of me, all filled with interest in their faces.

My friend beside me was asleep. I wonder if he already saw his pictures while he is sleeping.

It feels so good to see thousands of people, united as one by the passion of nation building and volunteerism for the love of our country.

Okay.

I can't write continuously. People kept in borrowing my pen. But it's alright, we're all here for the same reason. In fact, we're brothers and sisters here.

I was also surprised to meet some people from my hometown.

Sweet smiles.

Hand shakes.

Warm 'Hi's' and 'hello's.

If only this kind of event would be visible to the whole country. If only everyone will be united like this. If only every Filipino have this kind of passion burning in their hearts.

If only...
If only..
If only.

Well, if that's impossible, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. 

Book Review: The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Title: The Perks of Being a Wallflower 

Author: Stephen Chbosky

Page Count: 231 pages

Rating: 5 stars :))

Book synopsis:
Standing on the fringes of life... offers a unique perspective. But there comes a time to see what it looks like from the dance floor.

This haunting novel about the dilemma of passivity vs. passion marks the stunning debut of a provocative new voice in contemporary fiction: The Perks of Being a Wallflower.

This is the story of what it's like to grow up in high school. More intimate than a diary, Charlie's letters are singular and unique, hilarious and devastating. We may not know where he lives. We may not know to whom he is writing. All we know is the world he shares. Caught between trying to live his life and trying to run from it puts him on a strange course through uncharted territory. The world of first dates and mixed tapes, family dramas and new friends. The world of sex, drugs, and The Rocky Horror Picture Show, when all one requires is that perfect song on that perfect drive to feel infinite.

Through Charlie, Stephen Chbosky has created a deeply affecting coming-of-age story, a powerful novel that will spirit you back to those wild and poignant roller coaster days known as growing up.

My review:
This is probably one of the best books I've ever read. The words and sentences used are simple, yet it produced a very much captivating story of a normal teenage boy who faces the challenges of growing up around a bunch of people he doesn't really know. Any teen can relate to his life, as well as get clues, tips, and pieces of advice on how to reflect on life, love and friendship. Well, if you're not a teen anymore and you read this, you'll be able to go back in your growing up days and remember those crazy things you have done. Hands up for this book! Must read! Yay!

NO TO CYBERCRIME LAW IN THE PHILIPPINES!

Rainy day daydream

...drip, drip, drop...

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I love rainy days. And today is one of them. I love everything about rain, except it causes flood when it rains too much. I think it's best to read books while drinking  a hot cup of tea during the days the clouds cry.

The sound of raindrops soothes my mind and I hear a harmonious wave of music instead of water droplets.

Dancing in the rain is probably the best drama in my life. I don't usually use umbrella because I love walking in the rain. It seems like rain feeds my body and it feels good to me when raindrops land on my skin, touching me and reminding me how awesome it is to live.

It makes me feel complete.

When I don't feel like reading, I just lay down on my bed and curl up with my blanket like a cocoon. I close my eyes and start imagining different things like being bitten by a vampire, or having powers like a witch,and fly around freely like a bird.

Daydreaming is best done during rainy days, believe me. You'll just lay on your bed lazily and start daydreaming, wishing of different things and hoping they'll come true.

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...drip, drip, drop...

NAPATINGIN ako sa iyong mga mata

At sa isang iglap, ako ay natulala

Puso ko ay muling tumibok

Ngunit, di kaya ako lamang ay mapusok?

NAGUSTUHAN ko ang iyong mga ngiti

Wala akong pinalalampas na sandali

Nais ko'y araw-araw kang masilayan

Sa bawat sandali, ika'y mahawakan

MINAHAL ko ang lahat sa iyo

Sa buhay kong ito, kuntento na ako

Salamat sa pagdating sa aking buhay

Dahil pinintahan mo ito ng kaygagandang mga kulay

Book review: She said YES: The Unlikely Martyrdom of Cassie Bernall

Title: She said YES: The Unlikely Martyrdom of Cassie Bernall

Author: Misty Bernall

Page count: 163

Rating: 4.5 stars

Book synopsis:

She Said Yes is a story of growing up in the '90s, of peer pressure, adolescent turmoil, and the tough choices parents make. It is the story of a mother's loss - of dreams and hopes dashed by the cruel reality of death at an early age. But it is also a story of redemption more enduring than the tragedy that cut a young life short.

When 17-year-old Cassie Bernall walked into the library of her suburban high school around 11:00 on the morning of April 20, 1999, she had little more on her mind than her latest assignment for English class: another act of Macbeth. How could she know that by the end of the hour, two classmates would storm the school, guns blazing, and kill as many people as they could, including her? 

As the wounded were carried from the bloody scene, several stories of bravery emerged, but one spread faster and farther than the rest. Confronted by her killers, Cassie was asked, "Do you believe in God?" She answered, "Yes."

Praises for the book:

"One of the most gripping stories to come out of the shooting at Columbine High School" is told in the acclaimed national bestseller that illuminates the most remarkable aspect of 17-year-old Cassie Bernall's tragic death: her life.

"She Said Yes" is an "intense and fascinating memoir" *(Publishers Weekly)* of an ordinary teenager growing up in suburban Colorado, and faced -- as all teenagers are -- with difficult choices and pressures. It is only now, when the world knows Cassie Bernall as one of the Columbine High students killed by two rampaging schoolmates, that the choices she made offer a profound relevance for us all. Once a rage-filled young woman who walked a path similar to that of her killers, Cassie found a way out of her personal snares and, through her faith and a family's love, chose to embrace life with courage and conviction.

Told with unflinching honesty by her mother, Misty Bernall, Cassie's story is "a profoundly human story that should be read by every parent and every teenager" *(New York Post)*.

Book review:

So this is the book that I'm telling you from my recent book review of the book Hey Nostradamus of Douglas Coupland got its inspiration. This story of Cassie is fascinating and it changed my life. I have witnessed teens doing drugs, smoking, drinking, then suddenly change their lives once they came to knew God spiritually. This book tells about the grief of a mother who lost her only daughter and how her family was able to move on. There are pictures of Cassie with her family and friends sited in the book, proving that once, there lived a girl named Cassie and she held onto her faith by saying YES until she died.

Book review: Hey Nostradamus!

Title: Hey Nostradamus

Author: Douglas Coupland

Page count: 244 + 15 (Ideas, interviews, features...)

Rating: 5 stars

Book synopsis:
The novel follows the stories of victims of a fictional school shooting in North Vancouver in 1988. Coupland has expressed his concern that the killers of the Columbine received more focus than the victims; this is his story about the victims of tragedy. The novel is told in four parts, each with a different narrator and focus.

Book review:
The book talks about how the four stories were connected, and Cheryl's doodle on her notes "God is nowhere, God is now here". It talks about love, pain, family, miracles, and God. My favorite story was that of Cheryl's, because I think it has the most interesting parts. She and Jason were secretly married, she's pregnant, and active in her religious group "Youth Alive!". Jason killed one of the killers, trying to save Cheryl but its too late. Then he's accused and found guilty in the incident. Many believed he's a hero, but his father (Reg) didn't so her mother breaks down and angrily attacked Reg. Because of this family issue, he was then introduced to a darker side of the world. He ran away from home. Later on Reg realized his fault and tried wrote letters for Jason to come home to him, and posted them on trees hoping that one day, Jason would be able to read one of them.

I really recommend reading this book, and it is listed in the 101 books you should read before you die. The book is filled with twists and excitements that it kept me up the whole night to finish reading it. It made me feel the events that happened, as well as the trauma felt by the characters because of the high school massacre. At the back pages of the book, there were some facts and interviews about the author and the book as well. I learned that this was inspired by the book  She said YES" which is about Cassie Bernall, written by her own mother Misty Bernall. It is the true story of Cassie, who's one of the victims in the Columbine high school massacre.

I found the book and I'll post a review about it later this month.

Disconnection

There is this feeling that always disconnects us from the things that we want. This feeling is called fear. And this fear somehow holds us back from being strong. This feeling of disconnection because of fear from the things we want or we need makes us sad.

Somehow, we need to fight this feeling. We need to be strong so that no matter what happens, our lives can still go on. We should never allow this fear to stop us from doing the things that we like, from loving someone unconditionally, from reaching our goals, from making wishes come true, and most all, from making our dreams into reality.

Book lovers: HELP!

Is there anyone out there who could tell me where can I buy this series? If you happen to see this at a bookstore, please inform me.. I've been dying to buy Blue is for Nightmares Collection since 2007.. I only got White is for Magic.. so please help me.. 

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Series synopsis:

The Blue is for Nightmares series follows the adventures of Stacey Brown, a young Wiccan with psychic powers. Stacey uses her Wiccan religion to enhance her natural abilities in order to investigate crimes, disappearances, or issues that arise in her daily life. As the series progresses Stacey graduates from high school, learns how to better harness her abilities, and sorts through her complicated love life.

Pain...

What is pain? Pain is the feeling of getting hurt not just physically, but mentally and most of all, emotionally.

It is the emotion you feel when the one you love doesn't love you back, when someone cheated on you, when you are left alone holding on to his/her broken promises, when things with sentimental value are lost, or when you are taken for granted by someone you care for. There are so many things that can give you pain. But this I tell you: Pain is part of loving someone; loving is part of happiness, thus, pain is the root of happiness. If you are hurt emotionally, it is alright to cry. Remember that most of the times, the best beginnings come from the saddest endings.

Cry, but don't be miserable.

Be happy and proud of yourself no matter what

So I was back reading on my tumblr blog when I happen to read this post again. I remembered that I reblogged this because it touched my heart and it was then that i realized there are so many reasons to be happy and proud of who we are in spite of our imperfections.

“*Whoever is reading this, I want you to know something. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to have a smile plastered on your face because you are happy, not because you are pretending to be. You deserve to live the life you want to, without others putting you down. More importantly, you deserve to live a life without putting yourself down. Far too often we think of ourselves as not good enough, not smart enough, not pretty enough, not skinny enough. These thoughts might come from outside pressures, but more than anything they come from within ourselves because we spend our lives comparing ourselves to others or thinking about who we wish we could be. So I challenge you to love yourself. You are smart enough, you are pretty enough, you are good enough and don’t ever think otherwise. Be proud of who you are and be proud of who you are becoming and remember, love is louder than the voice inside your head telling you that you aren’t good enough.”

*Credits to the author

My mind soaring through the wind

Drifting in the waters

Walking down the streets

Looking for my lost memories.

Fear

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us."

I heard this quotation while listening to the lecture of 'Belle de Jour' Power Plannner's creator/founder. So then I thought, how does a person define fear? Is fear being afraid of a cockroach? Is it being afraid of heights? Of dark? Or is it being afraid of losing someone that means so much to you?

For me, fear is not being able to do what you can do, or forcing to do something that in reality, you can't do it. It is being afraid to be left alone in this world full of challenges wherein you only need atleast one person to survive. It is worrying about how you can do things you're not good at, or how you can do things that you're not supposed to do.

Fear is something that holds us back and disconnects us from reality. It is to love someone but somehow can't show/tell it. Fear is when you want to say something to someone special but you're afraid that he/she might not positively respond to it. So, what is fear to you? 'cause for me...

...MY FEAR IS LOSING YU.

The distance

What can you say about a relationship that gives no assurance? Are you willing to take the risk? Are you ready to accept the pain?

In this situation, you need a lot of trust, loyalty, faith, and most of all love. You haev to believe and hold on to the promises you made for each other -- not just to believe, but to have faith and hope that you will still be together in the end. You should believe and hope that you will be able to surpass the trials that might face you and survive together.

But what is the hardest and most painful part in this relationship?

The hardest part in this kind of relationship is that it gives you no assurance. It can be hard to fight and resist temptations as it is everywhere. But it can be easy to resist if you are sure and really determined to be with that person for the rest of your life.

Sometimes, love, trust and faith aren't enough. It hurts so much when you miss that person. You cry hard just because of thinking about that person and you know for yourself that nobody and nothing can make you stop because you just miss the person even more. When you see couples walking around, holding each other''s hand, it kills you and eventually you start missing that special someone again.

Of course, there are ways to fight this painful feeling. You text the person everyday, call him/her to hear his/her voice, and sometimes webcam chatting so you can see each other despite the distance. There are also times when you tend to send packages filled with sweet nothings just to make the person smile and feel even more special.

In the end, if both of you are able to survive, you'll realize that it's all worth the long wait. By the time you see each other again, you'll be able to feel that the love that connects you miles away becomes stronger and unbreakable. When you're together, you make every second count and you don't want to waste any single minute of your time together..

It's still up to both of you if you really love each other and are willing to wait until fate brings you closer to each other, that you no longer have to feel the pain of being far away from the person you love the most..

So, who says long distance relationships doesn't work?

Rewriting my life

Today I was scanning through the pages of my old notebooks when I saw this notes at the back of my old steno:

Words. These are some of my best friends back then when I was still in highschool. But I suddenly turned my back on them. I used to love writing down my thoughts. It makes me feel light inside. It comforts my heart and gives peace to my mind. But then what happened? I guess I changed my perspectives in life. I had a change of heart.

Today, I want to change these perspectives again. This time, I want to feel the might of the pen once again in my life. I want to write again. I want to rewrite what I used to be -- a writer.

Thoughts. Memories. Feelings. Mindshouts.

So many words are left behind. The wrong grammars in my life should be rewritten to get free from the errors of the past.

*had a hard time reading it since I wrote it backwards (mirror writing) and I can't find a mirror big enough to read it as a whole and I edited some parts.